The Sexuality Trap, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating issue and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to obtain love, and men use love to get sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles translate excellent sex as love. But those who fall under the Sex Trap go even farther because for these singles, making love carries enormous meaning and effects.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready too).

B.more commonly, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with reality when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases sexual desire), that makes the opportunity to have sex with someone we are drawn in to incredibly difficult to resist. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel very close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are involuntary and strong , resulting in powerful feelings of tourist attraction, excitement, closeness, wellness, and love .

When issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently justify by believing, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is excellent!" They most likely would not admit it, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. have a peek at this website Their primary scouting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mostly with gay males, states that much of his customers have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men specifically in urbane areas, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be good?".

However, North adds, "I think this is a ' man' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is essential. Chemistry is a provided that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry occur, though often it can grow over time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with common sense. While great sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you require to make your partner choices by paying full attention to your vision, worths, objectives, and requirements -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!

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